Garden Sign Sayings

Funny Quotes for Rustic Garden Signs

Painting rustic garden signs to display is so much fun – here are some garden sign sayings to paint on them:

Garden Sign Sayings...

Welcome to my garden (of course)

This garden is like my child: a little wild, hard to contain but makes me smile.

Snail Crossing

Watch for Birds/Snakes/Beetles etc.

So many weeds, so little Thyme

Pardon The Weeds - I'm Feeding The Bees

Feel free to talk to these plants – they understand

Unruly children will be given hugs, sugar and a free puppy

Flowers grow by inches but are destroyed by feet

I have a rock garden; last week three of them died

We’re bloomin’ crazy!

Now entering the Seedy Part of Town…

This is your last chance to bloom!

Birds Bathing

Swim at your own risk

Trespassers will be composted (sign stuck in a compost bin beside a pair of pants tucked in to old boots)

I Tried, It Died

What Weeds?

If you have time to read this, then you have time to weedIf you have time to read this, then you have time to weed

Bee the best you can be

Enter these enchanted woods – Ye who dare

May you always hear the whisper of wings

Do you, Gardener, take this Garden, to weed from this day forth?

In my garden time slows to a snails pace

The Earth laughs in flowers

Don’t make me come out there.
- Dog

Frog parking – all others will be toad

One day I shall burst my bud of calm and blossom into hysteria (or Wisteria)One day I shall burst my bud of calm and blossom into hysteria (or Wisteria)

Gardening begins at daybreak, and ends at back break

Gardening is for pansies


How does my garden grow?

1 part soil

2 parts water

3 parts wishful thinking


Everybirdy welcome (on a bird house)

Shh…germination in progress

No Japanese Beetles beyond this point



Untamed dandelions – do not feed!


Weedum invasium

Twigga mortisTwigga mortis

Gardenitus uncontrollius

Plantus unknownus

Bloomis notimus

To weed; or not to weed; that is the garden

Wishing you Butterfly mornings, and Wildflower afternoons

A beautiful garden is a work of heart

Compost happens

Loam wasn't built in a day

Gardeners are like doctors; they both bury their mistakes

Why not go out on a limb? That's where the fruit is...

May all your weeds be wildflowers

Flowers feed the soul

Weed ‘em and reap

To everything there is a season

Perch long – chirp much – sing often

Annuals: live fast, die young

Time began in a garden

Nothing bugs me in my garden

Die, Weeds, Die!

I don’t remember planting this

Gardener wanted – must look good bending over

Gardening – just another day at the plant

When heaven falls to earth it becomes a garden

Between these weeds, flowers grow

Your Garden Sign Sayings:

Tyler says; I would like to see one with HILLBILLY HEAVEN on it; my dad has a goofy looking half garden that looks like a hillbilly put one together.

Daniel from Chehalis, Washington sent in this one:

"Till and Turn Again"

Judy says: Hope I didn't just miss this quote on your site, but my friend has a sign that says "A garden is a thing of beauty, and a job forever" - You didn't miss it Judy, thanks so much for adding this one!

Eloise says "Free weeds; You pick 'em"

Dianne contributed these two: "Garden of Weedin'" and "You Grow, Girl!"

Kimberly gave us three funny sayings:

"We are so excited; we wet our plants."

"A dirty hoe is a happy hoe."

"Grow, Damn it"... or "Grow, Darn it"

Kristie says: "Please, no stopping at the gate to chat...

Unless you have a cold beer"

Rose sent this one: "Honeysuckle Haven"

Here's one from Dayna: "Get Down and Get Dirty"

Two new sayings, one from Jennifer: "Gardener wanted – must look good bending over" and Susan sent this one: "Old gardeners never die...they just spade away"

Thanks, Briana, for your really cute saying: "Plant Smiles, Grow Giggles, Harvest Love"

"It's Spring....we are so excited, we wet our plants!" Thanks to Margie for this one.

John shared this funny saying: "I'm not getting old, I just need to be repotted!"

This one is contributed by Tyler: " the seeds of desire within your mind can only bloom if you water them with knowledge"

Alice says: "Gardening: just another day at the plant"

This one from Debra: "Kiss of the sun for pardon..." on a plaque with birds and a sun.

Brenda contributed this one: "Potted Fever"

Jude says: "Show me your garden and I'll tell you who you are"

Carol's Granny used to say; "You gotta go through the brush to get to the picnic..." - how true!

Rina says she's been making plaques with witty quotes on for sale - as a pensioner, she's using her skills to bring in a bit more money to lighten the load. She sent me this picture to share with you:

My Little Paradise

Have you got more garden related sayings painted on rustic garden signs? In the comments below share your funny quote:

See more great Garden Sign Sayings here:

Visit the comments and leave your own funny gardening quote for others to enjoy!

What's your funny garden quote? 
You can add your garden quote in the comments below; enjoy what others have added, and send us your humorous gardening related saying.

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